Mainstream 12 step programs are all built from Alcoholics
Anonymous. All these fellowships were born from AA. So
this is why I use AA literature, to review the 11th Tradition, which
states “Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather
than promotion; we need always maintain personal anonymity at the
level of press, radio, and films.” AA says that the disease
of the alcoholic centers in the mind. The alcoholic needs to
change his way of thinking and be willing to do that. By doing
so, certain things will happen... the promises will come true.
Some
things happen to me that at times I need to talk about. I am
not the greatest verbal communicator... so instead I use the written
word. Most times these things or frustrations can be ironed out
one on one, either with my sponsor or someone close to me. Other
times though, I don't want to go through the process again... so I
write about my frustrations for everybody to see.
Early in March of 2010 I felt like I was attacked because of the
traditions of AA... specifically the 11th tradition. And
naturally I went on the defensive... but after thinking about it some
more I sought out some thoughts and advice from others.
First,
I will say that anybody who knows me knows that I do talk about 12
Step programs... but just not one program... numerous programs I have
talked about. Not once have I ever said, “I am a member
of...” nor have I ever said, “My home group is...” You
may guess as to which program I may belong – but that is all it
would be - a guess.
I do this for two reasons...
first is for the traditions and the other is I am not responsible for
my actions with any 12 Step group. ANY 12 Step fellowship. My
disclaimer says that Dreaming With Dave is not approved nor endorsed
by any particular 12 Step fellowship... nor is the site affiliated
with any 12 Step group.
I may have said that “I attended an AA meeting the other day.”
That doesn't mean that AA is where I am a member. There
are many people who attend AA meetings... some are not even
alcoholics. Some could be study groups from colleges.
In
my opinion the traditions of many 12 Step programs shouldn't be so
rigid that it hurts the program. There should be some
flexibility to help the program grow. Which in my opinion
deals directly with the 11th Tradition. Which says, “Our
public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion;
we need always maintain personal anonymity at the level of press,
radio, and films.” The key words here are “Our public
relations policy.” And the other words, “Personal
anonymity.”
In the early days of AA there was a book called Dr. Bob and the
Good Old Timers. This book is conference approved AA
literature. In those days,Tradition 11 just included “press
and radio.” Overtime technology changed and progressed and
“films” was added. A little after that the Internet came
along and that too was added. With that came the controversy of
“personal anonymity.”
So what is personal anonymity? Do I keep my name secret
from you? Can I tell you my first name? What about my
last name? I can at times say, “I am a member of a 12 step recovery
fellowship. I do practice the principles of the 12 Steps of
the fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous.” Does that make
me a member of AA? Did I say I was a member of AA? No I
did not. While I don't claim membership to AA... it is easy to
see that I do belong to a 12 Step group. If you dug around
enough you could probably find out which fellowship, but I don't
state it.
Where I personally could be breaking the tradition is by using my
whole name. Even at the meetings I attend, I use my whole name.
Which actually is suggested to be done at closed meetings of AA
– to use your whole name. But by using my whole name I still
haven't broken the tradition because I have never said which
fellowship I am a member of – never.
But first again it
is needed to look at the tradition... “Our public relations policy
is based on attraction rather than promotion...” What is? “Our
public relations policy” IS what is based on attraction rather then
promotion. So what is that? It would suggest a policy on
how to relate to the public.
And what is personal anonymity? For me it would be a grave
injustice for me to say I am a here all – know all of any 12 Step
Program. My personal anonymity means that my program of
recovery is just that – personal.
According
to Dr. Bob and the Good Old Timers, (a book about the early
days of AA in the Midwest.) On page 264, one paragraph down
this is what is said, “As far as anonymity was concerned we knew
who we were. It wasn't only AA but our social life. All
of our lives seemed to be spent together. We took people home
with us to dry out. The Cleveland group had the names,
addresses, and phone numbers of all its members.” One member
Warren goes on to say, “In fact, I remember Doctor Bob saying, 'If
I got up to speak and gave my name as Dr. Bob S., people who needed
help would have had a hard time getting in touch with me.” Dr.
Bob, often introduced himself as Dr. Bob Smith, a member of
Alcoholics Anonymous.
Warren recalls Dr. Bob saying
there were two ways to break the anonymity tradition. You may
not agree with it... but this is conference approved literature. The
first way is by giving your name at the public level of press or
radio. So a private radio station or private press wasn't
breaking the tradition. This private sector was strictly for
their own organization. Now this is the big one. The
second way is by being so anonymous that you can't be reached by
other drunks. WOW, that is quite a statement. By guarding
your anonymity so closely that other drunks can't reach you for help.
In a 1969 February Grapevine article D.S. of San Mateo, California
wrote that Dr. Bob commented on the 11th tradition as follows “Since
our tradition on anonymity designates the exact level where the line
should be held, it must be obvious to everyone who can read and
understand the English language that to maintain anonymity at any
other level is definitely a violation of this tradition.” Read
that again.
“The AA who hides his identity from a fellow
AA by using only a given name (first name) violates the tradition
just as much as the AA who permits his name to appear in the press in
connection with matters pertaining to AA.”
He goes on to
say, “The former is maintaining his anonymity above the level of
press, radio, and films, while the latter is maintaining his
anonymity below the level of press, radio, and films. Whereas
the tradition states that we should maintain our anonymity at the
level of press, radio, and films.”
Some other things from this article; a couple of paragraphs down,
Dr. Bob said we weren't suppose to break our anonymity to the
newspapers or the radio, but he didn't think we would get any place
if people didn't know we belonged to AA. He had the firm
conviction that you should let it be known that you are an AA member
in the community. And he was always sure to tell you about it
every time you met him. This originally appeared on page 265 of
Dr. Bob and the Good Old Timers. The “we” in that
statement – it's me – it's you. From AA approved
literature, “You should let it be known that you are an AA member
in the community.” Sorry... but that is what it says.
Also
from The Grapevine in 1981, “Understanding anonymity.” It
starts with “Alcoholics Anonymous is a fellowship of men and
women who share their experience, strength, and hope, with each
other, that they may solve their common problem and help others to
recover from alcoholism. The only requirement for membership is a
desire to stop drinking. There are no dues or fees for AA
membership, we are self-supporting through our own contributions. AA
is not allied with any sect, denomination, politics, organization or
institution. Does not wish to engage in any controversy; neither
endorses or opposes any causes. Our primary purpose is to stay sober
and to help other alcoholics to achieve sobriety.”
Then it starts, “Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all
our traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before
personalities.” What is the purpose of anonymity in Alcoholics
Anonymous? Why is it often referred to as the greatest single
protection the fellowship has to ensure its continued existence and
growth?
If we look at the history of AA from 1935 till now
it is clear that anonymity serves two different and yet equally vital
functions. On the personal level, anonymity provides protection
for all members from identification as alcoholics, a safeguard of
special importance to newcomers. And second at the level of
press, radio, films, and new media technologies, anonymity stresses
the equality in the fellowship of all members by putting the brakes
on those who otherwise might exploit their AA affiliation to
achieve recognition, power, or personal gain.”
Dreaming
With Dave has no need for personal recognition, nor power, and I have
no ulterior motives for personal gain. This blog is
self-supporting and the reality is I have not made any profit from
this blog or from me speaking about my recovery.
The article goes on to say that anonymity on a person to person
basis was promised by AA to all that attended its meetings, because
its founders and first members were all recovering alcoholics. They
knew from their personal experience how ashamed most alcoholics are
about their drinking and how fearful they are about public exposure.
The social stigma of alcoholism was great. Those early AA
members recognized a firm assurance of confidentiality was imperative
if they were to succeed in attracting and helping other alcoholics to
achieve sobriety.
Over the years, anonymity has
proved one of the greatest gifts AA offers to suffering alcoholics.
Without it many would never attend their first meeting.
Although the stigma has lessened to some degree most newcomers
still find admission of their alcoholism so painful that it is
possible only in a protected environment. Anonymity is central
to this atmosphere of trust and openness.
Valuable as
privacy is to new members, it is noteworthy that most of them are
eager to share the good news of their AA affiliation with their
families. Such disclosure however is always their own choice.
AA as a whole seeks to ensure that individual members stay as
private and protected as they wish. Or as open as they wish.
But always with the understanding that anonymity at the level
of press, radio, films, and new media technology is crucial to our
continued sobriety and growth at both personal and group level.
Anonymity at the media level – After its first few years of
success the fellowship attracted much favourable attention in the
press. Articles praising AA appeared in magazines and
newspapers across the country. And with each new article the
ranks of AA grew. In those days everyone still feared the
consequences of public disclosure. So the first press coverage
guarded members anonymity for safety sake. The arrival of
new media technology such as the Internet offered new vehicles to
carry the AA message to the public. AA members continue to
protect their anonymity in these new public media outlets.
As
public awareness of alcoholism increased, the stigma decreased and
soon some AA members began to publicly acknowledge their affiliation
in the media. Have I done that? No I have not. I
have never said that I am a member of AA, or NA, or CODA, or any
other 12 step fellowship.
There was a famous athlete who
went to the media and announced his affiliation to AA and at first
the founders were OK with it... having never experienced the backlash
of publicity. Other members followed by breaking their anonymity.
Some motivated by goodwill, others by personal gain, while some
tied in their affiliation to improve their business.
It didn't take long for AA to realize that over zealous
self-serving anonymity breakers could quickly jeopardize the
fellowships hard won reputation. And they saw that if one
person was made an exception other exceptions would follow. To
insure the unity, effectiveness, and welfare of AA - anonymity had to
be universal. It was the guardian of all that AA stood for.
In
stressing the equality of all AA members in unity and the common bond
for the recovery from alcoholism anonymity serves as the spiritual
foundation of the fellowship.
In 1946 Bill W wrote, “The
word anonymous has immense spiritual significance, subtlety and
powerfully, it reminds us we are always to place principles before
personalities. That we have renounce personal glorification in
public that our movement not only preaches but actually practices a
true humility as a whole.” You renounce personal
glorification in public.
Myself, I don't want glorification, that is not what I am
about. I don't want to be glorified for something I am
powerless over. That glorification belongs to my Higher Power.
My recovery is not for me, my writings are not for me. They
are for my Higher Power. I also believe it is Her wish, that I
share the gift She has given me with you.
Facts about
anonymity in AA – from AA conference approved literature. It is not
the media's responsibility to maintain AA's traditions, it is our own
individual responsibility! OK, it's not the media's
responsibility – but what if someone in the media is a member of AA
or NA or CA? Nowhere in conference approved literature does it
say that an alcoholic who is in the media most maintain the
traditions.
It is not my responsibility as a writer and
the webmaster of Dreaming With Dave to maintain the traditions of a
program in which I have not assumed membership too. If I said
that I was a member of AA or NA or Alanon or ACOA or CODA or any
other number of 12 Step fellowships, then yes, it would be my
responsibility to maintain those traditions.
***ANY DOUBT AT ALL? READ THIS***
From AA conference
approved literature, “AA members may disclose their identity and
speak as recovered alcoholics, giving radio, TV, and internet
interviews without violating the traditions so long as their AA
membership is not revealed.”
Want to read that
again from the General Service Office of AA?
“AA
members may disclose their identity and speak as recovered
alcoholics, giving radio, TV, and internet interviews without
violating the traditions so long as their AA membership is not
revealed.” Again, I have never revealed in public what
program I am a member of.
**************************************
From still other conference approved literature – Experience
suggests that AA members respect the right of other AA members to
maintain their own level of anonymity at whatever level they wish.
When speaking as AA members at non-AA events people usually use
first names only. Did you notice in that last sentence it says
"usually."
Everything with the traditions were
written as a suggestion... it is not written with severe bondage or a
supreme law... it is freedom of choice and the freedom of an
individuals own anonymity.
I have never intentionally
broken the 11th Tradition of any 12 Step fellowship. By using
AA approved literature I do believe that I am following the
traditions. Why did I use AA literature? Because every
other 12 Step program is modeled after AA.
As Dr Bob
himself said, kind of comically and sarcastically, “Since our
tradition on anonymity designates the exact level where the line
should be held, it must be obvious to everyone who can read and
understand the English language that to maintain anonymity at any
other level is definitely a violation of this tradition.” So
with the writings of Dr. Bob and conference approved literature,
there is no doubt in my mind that I have not violated the 11th
Tradition.
I would like to thank the Monty Man at Take 12
Radio for letting me have a listen to his broadcast on this subject.
He is the one who did the research on this... and for that I'll
be eternally grateful...
